this may well, be the end...

there are so much on my mind all the time. it makes it hard to me to sleep these days. as my big 30 is creeping up on me. i can't help but wonder what the fuck have i been doing for the last 30 years... i am constantly fighting with myself about being true to myself and others. almost all the time i get the shaft. hard... my father always told me one of my biggest problem is that i think with my heart, not with my head. i never really thought it was a problem at all until this year. 2011 sure has been one hell of a year so far. so much to the point of me really doubting myself and who i really am. lately i discovered my source of anger. my work or job or something i do to pay the bills. i want so much, however, i don't really see the point anymore. where i am its just going to be the same. i helped build a company. worked my ass off, everyday seems like a battle. i really hope things will be better for me soon... because i am getting really tired of trying to cheer myself up and trying to be optimistic. i'm just frustrated maybe. i'm tired of being on edge all the time. i think i need to get away. somewhere where no one knows my name.

helping hands...

charity t-shirts! all profit goes to help japan. for orders please email me. brian@jtmotoring.com

i guess this is the final design of the shirt.
yoshi san from weds didn't give me details.
but i'm told they are ready to ship.

if you like one please email me your size too and address.

thank you all.

they are just things...

after a hard day of work, i came home to a mess. front door right open... my stuff, missing. fucking suck ballz. my labtops, tv, xbox360, ps3, wii, cellphones, dvds, games, guitars, and my clothes. who the fuck steals clothes. now i'm left with a gym bag of t-shirts, and some socks... they left my car parts alone. took the cops 3hrs to get to me only to have them tell me things i already know. wtf?!

why cant i come out on top? this year has been BAD...

loss

heart goes to those who are lost in earthquake in japan... goes to show, life is short. live true, love hard, and most of all enjoy every little things in life.